Ok. Tonight's blog is brought to you in part by my lovely wonderful girlfriend. The topic you ask? romantic couples. A relationship is hard to keep in good graces.not, "this feels like work and hard labor" but that it requires a couple to work together to achieve similar goals, which no matter the relationship, forced mediation is just plain hard for humans.
A lot of people, probably most, never get a good feel of what it takes to keep a relationship healthy, alive, and thriving, from how they grew up. Kids can see the outcomes of how a relationship is when observing how the parents interact. This means they know that if a couple is"good" they kiss, smile, hold hands, and do all sorts of cute couple things. These things don't make a couple good though, just result from what does.(as an aside I believe most of the west's current martial problems stem in some part from this lack of understanding)
A relationship is built on a few key things (by no means am I an expert in relationships, or in explaining them):
first I believe is trust. How can anything be believed (like where you were last night) or bestowed (like borrowing the car) amongst many other aspects. So building and Maintaining this trust is critical to keeping a relationship alive.
Second is listening. If you don't hear that she needs some new feminine products in an emergency, you can bet things won't be pleasant for you for a while. If he is saying something he thinks is amusing, don't sigh and took your eyes and ignore it, he probably will go out to find someone who will respond.(not to say sighing and rolling your eyes can't be a response in a positive, just using it as the cliche "ignore"response). Listen to each others wants and needs to keep the relationship alive, and then act on those things to make it Thrive.
Third part is just that: taking action. talk is cheap. To prove your listening skills and give more reason for your partner to trust you, work to get things done. Surprises are always welcome, of course, but help is even more accepted. You function together, so don't be afraid to pitch money on a project for them, you benefit too! If they ned help around the house, just remember they aren't your maid, you live there too, and the quicker you can get things done, the sooner you can have fun:D. acting like a loving adult will strengthen the relationship and let it grow.
Now there are tons of other rules to making a relationship succeed, but I believe that most of those smaller rules stem from one of the above rules.
I use this topic tonight because I believe, very strongly, that I am in a relationship that is thriving, surviving, growing, and just plain kicking ass. She knows why i think this,i know why. But there you go, a hidden motive for everything.
A lot of people, probably most, never get a good feel of what it takes to keep a relationship healthy, alive, and thriving, from how they grew up. Kids can see the outcomes of how a relationship is when observing how the parents interact. This means they know that if a couple is"good" they kiss, smile, hold hands, and do all sorts of cute couple things. These things don't make a couple good though, just result from what does.(as an aside I believe most of the west's current martial problems stem in some part from this lack of understanding)
A relationship is built on a few key things (by no means am I an expert in relationships, or in explaining them):
first I believe is trust. How can anything be believed (like where you were last night) or bestowed (like borrowing the car) amongst many other aspects. So building and Maintaining this trust is critical to keeping a relationship alive.
Second is listening. If you don't hear that she needs some new feminine products in an emergency, you can bet things won't be pleasant for you for a while. If he is saying something he thinks is amusing, don't sigh and took your eyes and ignore it, he probably will go out to find someone who will respond.(not to say sighing and rolling your eyes can't be a response in a positive, just using it as the cliche "ignore"response). Listen to each others wants and needs to keep the relationship alive, and then act on those things to make it Thrive.
Third part is just that: taking action. talk is cheap. To prove your listening skills and give more reason for your partner to trust you, work to get things done. Surprises are always welcome, of course, but help is even more accepted. You function together, so don't be afraid to pitch money on a project for them, you benefit too! If they ned help around the house, just remember they aren't your maid, you live there too, and the quicker you can get things done, the sooner you can have fun:D. acting like a loving adult will strengthen the relationship and let it grow.
Now there are tons of other rules to making a relationship succeed, but I believe that most of those smaller rules stem from one of the above rules.
I use this topic tonight because I believe, very strongly, that I am in a relationship that is thriving, surviving, growing, and just plain kicking ass. She knows why i think this,i know why. But there you go, a hidden motive for everything.
posted from Bloggeroid
No comments:
Post a Comment